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July 29, 2005
Surviving Terrible Tuesday
This appeared in today's Mumbai Mirror.
My wife was stuck on the top of Parel flyover for 2 hours from around 4.00PM, trying to get to Matunga. Not having moved an inch, she turned around and went to the ITC Grand at Parel for a much-needed loo and coffee break, after some taxi drivers removed the intervening divider stones. While waiting to get back into the car at around 6.30PM (she finally reached home 2 hours later), she saw an out-of-towner who wanted to go to Lifestyle at Phoenix, angrily yelling at his driver for coming late. Bijal tried to tell him that leaving ITC, at that time, was insane, but he refused to listen and drove off with his family. Tourists can be so stupid sometimes!
At midnight, my Dad and I finally decided to drive home to Matunga, from Girgaum. We actually reached the flyover after Phoenix Mills in 7 minutes flat - no traffic, no water-logging, a few stray people and complete “sannata” all along the way. Seeing a flowing river below, we turned back, and then tried Tilak Bridge, but turned back halfway between Siddhi Vinayak and Shivaji Park, then from Portuguese church as well and later from below the Parel flyover, having reached there via the S bridge past Jacob Circle. Having turned back from the Bhoiwada road after Tata Hospital, we finally went onto RAK Road, reached Wadala and parked our car on a free pavement and hoofed it up, reaching home at 2.00AM.
We were the lucky ones. My sister’s husband was stuck between Andheri and Santacruz, alone in his car for over 16 hours. Bijal’s brother reached his home in Andheri, at 2.00AM after having walked 10 kms. My mother-in-law was stuck until Thursday, in Nallasopara, where she had gone for some work, . My 80-years old uncle walked back to Matunga from Masjid.
There was complete chaos when we walked from Wadala to Matunga, but it needed the morning light to truly appreciate the madness. There were vehicles of all kinds, clogging both sides of each and every big or small road in Wadala, Five Gardens and Matunga, along with crowds of people, walking, trying to find a way home. Some were palpably lost - like the guy who thought Khalsa college was Ruparel college and that he was in Matunga West. Most cars hadn’t moved for over 12 hours. People who had hit Don Bosco by 8PM had reached Aurora (200 meters away) by 8AM. There was no food, no water and most cellphone batteries had died down.
Except for the people who helped each other and locals who tried to help those who were stuck, everyone and everything failed us. The weather services, traffic police, the fire-brigade, most cellular networks, the land-lines, the railways, Reliance Energy, the politicians, everyone…
I know one thing about this city of ours. Whenever disaster strikes, we cannot and should not expect any help from our authorities and services. We must assume that we will be on our own and each one of us needs to have some sort of a Plan B in place for such situations. Or pray to God, or whatever…..
PS: Those who have waded through water, please talk to your local GP for doxycycline prophylaxis against leptospirosis.
Posted by bhavinj at 04:56 AM | Comments (0)
July 22, 2005
Girls and the All-Boys's School
This was published in today's Mumbai Mirror.
“Sunita, I love you”. Someone, in class XD, had written out these words in chalk, on the outside wall, directly facing Khalsa College. Seven upset Sunitas landed up in the principal’s office that day. The whole division was hauled up, and I can’t remember whether anyone really owned up, but we all thought it was pretty cool!
We had our own pretty “Sunitas” in Don Bosco anyway. Each year’s annual day production saw a good number of “women” taking part, and it was only because you knew that it was an all-boys’ school, that you also knew that they were “boys”. How could you then blame Oedipus for following in love with his “mother” or the male lead who took his own time in “Taming the Shrew” or those who thought the belly-dancer was the best part of Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat.
The annual day productions have always been awesome. These days the politically correct thing to do is to have as many students on stage as possible, so that no one feels left out. Two decades ago, you made it onto stage, only if you were very good. If you weren’t cut out to act, you weren’t, and that was that!
We also had access to virtually any sport that you can think of (yes, even billiards and tennis!). And, come to think of it, we could have even had a mini-golf course. Though the school is known for winning hockey, football, basketball and sometimes cricket championships, our biggest passion was square-ball, in which we would have won even the world championships. Unfortunately, the game itself seems to have died down a decade or so ago…the current rage is something called handminton.
None of these extra-curricular activities however would have been happened, if it hadn’t been for our teachers and the priests. Most of them have since retired or passed away and I would love to list all of them, but I am allowed only 500 words. So here’s to them: “to all our teachers who made a difference, thank you! Take a bow!”
There is always an indescribable ethos that pervades every school with unwritten laws and behavioral patterns developed over decades, which students inadvertently imbibe. These, along with the peer group, apparently more than parental values (that’s what the child psychologists say these days), shape children. Though in junior college, most Boscoites are hormonally charged, libidinous animals, suddenly let loose from an all-boys cage, in later years, the “better” values start kicking in. These are what make us different and are probably why the vast majority of Boscoites do exceedingly well in life. Which is also why you wonder how parents can flock to new start-up schools, just because they are “different” or “ICSE” or whatever, when these schools still haven’t had the time to develop any character.
PS:
Another great institution along the fringes of Matunga, J B Vachha High School, lost its principal early this week. I came to know Mrs. Khorshed Bharucha, in her last few years and was impressed by her quiet dignity and courage in the face of what she had to endure. Though she had a great support system in the form of her students, friends and family, any lesser person would have crumbled and given up a long time ago. I know that words cannot in any way replace the loss that her family is facing, but we all share their sorrow. We will miss her!
Posted by bhavinj at 06:48 PM | Comments (0)
July 14, 2005
All South Indians are not Madrasis
This was published in today's Mumbai Mirror.
Indira emailed me after last week’s piece and listed her “Four Pillars” of Matunga; Giri Stores, Mysore Concerns, Anand Bhuvan and Nalli Silk Stores. The funny thing about this list, as I emailed back to her, is that, except possibly for Anand Bhuvan, the other three don’t even come up in the far distant horizon of my vision. This is an entirely Tamil vision of Matunga, “little Madras”, as she calls it.
As a Gujju, I can’t but wonder what the “Four Pillars” for Gujjus & Kutcchis would be. Probably Garnish/Classic, Anand Bhuvan/Air-conditioned Udipi, Chheda Stores and Pramanik/Milap. The Udipi joints will feature on all lists, simply because idlis, dosas and vadas are now universal.
Its amazing how Matunga can be so different for different people. In my first piece, I had mentioned about the “right” place to live in. That depends on who you are. The “right” place, if you’re Tamil, is to the left of the main road when you’re facing Sion, i.e. the Westside and the “right” place for Gujjus, is to the right of the main road, i.e. the Eastside.
Most Gujjus (for that matter, most north Indians), believe that everyone south of Mumbai is a “Madrasi” and speaks “undugundu”. It was thanks to the multi-cultural nature of Don Bosco, that reasonably early in life, I figured out that “Madrasis” were not all “Madrasis”. That just like there are Gujaratis, Marwaris, Punjabis, Sindhis, there are Kannadigas, Malayalees, Tulus, Reddys, Kammas, Tamils, etc. Two of my best friends are Tamil, both coincidentally staying on the Eastside and from them I also learnt the difference between Palghat Brahmins, Iyers and Iyengars, that ‘panande’ means twelve and the reason why many Iyengars have blue eyes.
Sadly, this East-West divide is reducing. Simply because, most Tamils are leaving and either migrating to the US or going away to places like Chembur, Dombivli and Sanpada. With each new construction boom, Gujjus and Kutcchis are are taking over both sides of Matunga.
And very likely, 10-15 years from now, Mysore Concerns will sell fresh gathiya and jalebis, the smell of fried besan, replacing the coffee aroma that currently pervades the vicinity. Nalli Silk Sarees will become Pramanik for Ladies, and Giri Stores will become a Navneet Publications outlet. Only the Udipi joints will remain, but they were never Tamil to begin with and are run by Naiks and Shettys originally from South Karnataka.
PS: Swapna emailed me, saying that if I have problems with Matunga East (the Matunga that I write about), what about the plight of those like her, who live in Matunga West! For those who don’t know, Matunga West is a cluster of roads nestled between Mahim and Dadar stations, with Ruparel college and Star City (earlier Badal, Bijlee, Barkha) as its most famous landmarks. The two Matungas incidentally are connected by the “Z” footbridge.
Its weird! Just as we are more racist towards blacks than the whites were ever to us, Matunga East’s attitude to Matunga West is worse than the South Mumbai attitude to Matunga East. Forget about a superiority complex…people in Matunga East don’t even acknowledge that the other Matunga (West) exists.
Posted by bhavinj at 06:46 PM | Comments (8)
July 05, 2005
Matunga, What's That!
This was published in today's Mumbai Mirror.
As a child, I often had to visit a cousin, living on Napean Sea Road. Once that cousin had friends visiting.
“Where do you live?”
“King’s Circle, Matunga”
“Oh…..”
“Uh….”
“Where’s that?”
“After Dadar and before Sion.”
“Sion comes when we go to Lonavla, doesn’t it?”
“It’s the circle that comes before”
“Oh…”
There was a pregnant pause during which they tried to digest the fact that someone actually lived in such places. For the sake of gastric stability, I was then promptly ignored and left to my own devices.
I remembered this, during a meeting last Saturday in Powai. We were discussing a suburban project, when I questioned its usefulness. My colleague immediately compared me to another senior professor, who questioning the viability of the project, had told him, “but Mumbai ends at Mahim.” Which, I told him, was much better than “Mumbai ends at Worli”, that a couple of my friends practicing in Girgaum, keep saying.
It then struck me how Matunga can be a less than 4 minutes blip on the car radar, a blurry 1.5km montage of buildings and shops, nestled between Dadar and Sion. That morning, short of time, I drove drive directly to Powai from Girgaum, without stopping off at home. From the Ruia college signal, in three minutes flat, I swung past King’s Circle, stopping momentarily at the Brahmanwada signal, from where in another half-minute, I was past Gandhi Market, and out of Matunga. Compare this to Powai. Though the drive from the Sion to the LBS Marg flyovers, took just 17 minutes, it took another 35 minutes just to reach the Renaissance. Powai just seemed to go on and on and on…
So, I am not sure I blame the “South Mumbai” types. Unless you have relatives or friends in Matunga or love Udipi food or have studied in VJTI or UDCT, there really is no reason to know anything about the place, except that it comes on the way to Lonavla.
Rarely though, you can get pleasantly surprised. A few years ago, Dad’s friend invited us for dinner to Bombay Brasserie, in Worli. They stayed on Carmicheal road and his son and daughter-in-law had just returned for good, after 7-8 years in the US. We went reluctantly, not knowing what level of snootiness to expect. At the table, we were all trying hard to find common-ground, when the daughter-in-law mentioned that she used to live at Five Gardens, part of the Matunga mentality coverage. When she and my wife realized that they were both Vachhaites, and that too, just a couple of years apart, they promptly sat down next to each other and gossiped the evening away. And the rest of us managed to amuse ourselves at their expense.
Plus c’a change, plus c’est la meme chose. Twenty five years after the Nepean Sea Road incident, at South Mumbai events, the mention of Matunga as a place of residence, still manages to raise an eyebrow. Sometimes, both…, and I am sure the rest as well, if we had more.
Posted by bhavinj at 06:44 PM | Comments (0)
July 03, 2005
No Duvidha - Batman Begins Pounds Parineeta & Paheli
After a long, long time, I actually managed to squeeze in three current films within one week.
My wife and I saw Parineeta at the Wadala IMAX late Saturday night. The next Thursday, I went with a gully friend of mine to see Batman Begins, at CineMax in Sion, and the next night, a few of us went to see Paheli at Central Plaza, in Girgaum.
I remember going to Eros to see Batman, in 1989/1990. We didn’t have tickets that day, but since we usually managed to get extras (all my wife had to do was to put on a “hopeful” face, outside the entrance), we took a chance. I specifically remember that day, because we first got extras for the stalls and then held on for balcony extras, which we eventually got as well, and then sold the stalls extras to some other hopefuls who had been milling around us.
Batman was and still is a great film. Tim Burton used Michael Keaton, Jack Nicholson and Kim Bassinger to give us an unexpectedly Blade Runnerish, dark, non-cartoonish film. Compared to the Superman movies, which were more bubble-gummy in nature, Batman was the first proper adult comic-book adaptation that I had seen…much like Daredevil and the Hulk in the last few years, it was brilliantly nihilistic. Batman II was pretty good as well, but when Joel Schumacher took over for the next two, he went the bubble-gummy way (Robin with nipples) and screwed up the series.
Christopher Nolan’s Batman Begins is a tribute to Tim Burton’s vision. The last scene is a gem – making sure there will be a sequel, which however has already been made. I felt disappointed just once…when Bruce Wayne enters the Chinese house at the top of the mountain, I really thought I would see David Carradine turn around and talk to him. Liam Neeson is brilliant as well though, but Katie Holmes’ role could have been played by anyone. After a long time, with Batman Begins and Revenge of the Sith, in the last month, we have had two seriously great prequel films. Both films, especially Batman Begins, have extremely strong story lines and characterizations. Even better than Tim Burton’s Batman and the first two Star Wars prequels, respectively.
And there lies the problem with Parineeta and Paheli.
Parineeta is a film with lovely production values and music and a beautifully cast Vidya Balan. Equally miscast however is Sanjay Dutt. The biggest problem lies with the way the story is filmed. The whole movie hinges on a misunderstanding, which intuitively just doesn’t ring true. And in a serious film (we are not talking Amar Akbar Anthony here), even the slightest dishonesty in the story affects the credibility of the film. From the time the audience, along with Saif Ali Khan, understands the so-called goof-up that led to all the angst and tear-jerking, everything feels contrived. And from then on, it is a downhill slide to a silly, childish ending, completely out of sync with the film and more evocative of a Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikander bicycle race ending. What were they thinking of!
Why do so many of our films do this? They start so promisingly, but then ejaculate prematurely! As Black did earlier this year and Devdas before that.
Paheli lives up to the Parineeta tradition. When a one paragraph story needs to be filmed,
obviously, the staging has to be colorful and grand. But the film is a half an hour too long with three songs too many – maybe with some really tight editing and a shorter length, like Black, it might have just worked. But, despite the really great ensemble cast (Juhi, Anupam Kher, Rajpal Yadav) and Shahrukh Khan in a double role, Amol Palekar, just can’t save the film. And it is his cross to bear.
Most importantly, the credibility issue rears its head here as well. The film’s basic premise rests on the fact that the husband is going to be away for five years in “pardes”. Pardes is eventually Jamnagar, which is really just that much far away or not, from any corner of Rajasthan. Do you really believe, that a husband who actually misses his wife and family would wait for four years, before going home, especially when he has received no news from home. Four years? Jeez! It is one thing to suspend belief in films like Main Hoon Na and Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, but in a film, which hinges on its story, discrepancies such as these, consciously or subconsciously, contribute to the film’s eventual demise.
Take Black for example, where Amitabh Bachhan is supposed to have Alzheimer’s but behaves as someone who has Parkinsonism. Or the fact that the parents who are rich and educated actually did not get special tutoring and rearing for their daughter from the first year? Honestly, do you really think this would happen in real life, in a family such as the one shown by Sanjay Leela Bhansali? Which is why, though Black is well made and has some terrific acting, it failed to get under my skin - it’s a good film, but highly over-rated as a great film!
In the end I will remember Parineeta and Paheli for entirely different things.
I overslept after Parineeta and woke up at 6.30AM for a 7.00AM flight to Nagpur. I made it to the airport from Matunga, within 12 minutes, having had just enough time to dump some clothes in a bag and pull on a pair of jeans. For some reason (and yes, we begged), Jet Airways really came through for me – we had called them on the way and they actually had the boarding pass ready for me at the standby counter, despite the check-in counters having closed at 6.30AM sharp.
As for Paheli, the couple we went out with, dropped us back in their new Toyota Innova, which I promptly thought we should get as well. If we do, Paheli’s place in my consciousness will be assured…if not…that’s not a “duvidha” to figure out anyway, is it!
Posted by bhavinj at 11:31 PM | Comments (0)
